29 May 2012
Moore Park NSW 1363
Dear Mr Harrigan,
I would like to apply for a position with the Video Refereeing department within the NRL. My name is Curtis Woodward and I believe by offering my services I can improve the seemingly low standards currently being portrayed by the video referees across this fine country.
My eyes aren’t, and never will be, painted on and I strongly feel this would be an advantageous quality to have.
This quality aside, I have lived on Earth since my birth in 1986 and am assured by scientists that I am not from another planet. Unlike yourself and some of the people you employ at this moment.
Naturally being from this planet, I feel I have a quality that current video referees do not possess. That off course being that I live in reality.
The simple decision to either award a try or to disallow one has been blurred by you and other officials who seemingly want to destroy a simple game. Or more realistically, keep yourself in the headlines.
I would like to ask how and why Sam Kasiano was not awarded a try on Monday Night Football when he clearly deserved that try.
The obvious question regarding Greg Inglis and Origin last Wednesday has been asked a million times. Logic and common sense says Inglis lost the ball but somehow Sean Hampstead awarded a try because Robbie Farah was attacking the ball. Can you guys read minds now?
Perhaps there is a telepathic power that you haven’t told us about?
Please do not take this as a cheap shot and I hope my above comments don’t hinder my chances of becoming a video referee. I feel that honesty is the best medicine.
I would also like to let you know that I hate bright lights, car lights and most importantly, limelight. Which means, Mr Harrigan, if you employ me you can keep every last bit of the limelight that you continue to steal from our great players.
I appreciate you taking the time to read my application and hope to hear from you soon.
Curtis R Woodward
P.S: Is it true that you have a mirror in every room of your house?
THIS WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED ON FOOTYSOCIAL.COM.AU